A Test to Know if You Found a Good Therapist
I wanted to put together an easy test you can take after just starting with a therapist or for one you’ve been with for a while to determine if you’ve found a good therapist to help you on your journey. I would encourage you and anyone to use this test and its result as a suggestion rather than an absolute guide. I encourage you to trust your gut in this process too. This guide may help to point you towards what things to observe and reflect on even if you haven’t met with your first therapist yet. As a general rule, if you are presenting with some complex challenges, it tends to be best to seek providers with greater training backgrounds.
Why it matters
A therapist-client relationship is extremely influential on how effective therapy will be. If you do your own research, you’ll find that most studies looking at this therapist-client relationship (therapeutic alliance) find that it is responsible for around 30% of the therapy outcome. Then about 15% more comes from the techniques the therapist is using.
I want to take this time to also remind people to think of therapists like restaurants. If you had a bad experience, you wouldn’t be likely to say that restaurants are bad. You would likely say that a specific restaurant was bad. I’ve seen a lot of people struggle to have their symptoms untreated due to a bad experience with a provider. Then, years later they summoned the courage to try again to have things go so much better after they find a great fit with their therapist. Many go on to share how they wish they kept trying and didn’t lose so much time building that courage to try again or to try with someone new even if they were already working with someone where things didn’t seem right.
Scoring: For each true and false statement below that you assign a true score to add one point. At the end, I will place my general score interpretations that can be used as a template.
Rapport
They come across as authentic. (T/F)
They were attentive during our consultation, intake, or session(s). (T/F)
The meeting felt positive. I did not feel judged when sharing. (T/F)
Therapist Character
They seemed to want what’s best for me. (T/F)
They did not claim to be an expert on every topic. (T/F)
They took the time to educate themselves on a topic that they were less familiar with that was relevant to my challenges. (T/F)
Therapist Competence
They had knowledge of and experience with working with someone presenting with my symptoms. (T/F)
The therapist used techniques that had strong research support behind them. (T/F)
They were or seemed willing to challenge me. They were focused on me getting better. (T/F)
Effectiveness
I’ve noticed myself moving towards the goals we set in therapy. (T/F)
They were open to alternatives and working alongside you rather than simply prescribing a plan to you. (T/F)
They worked to give me the tools to continue doing the work outside of the sessions. (T/F)
Practical Things
They accepted my insurance or charged a rate that I can afford. (T/F)
Although I understand that off days can happen, I feel that there is value for my time and money in the work we are doing. (T/F)
I want to keep working with them. (T/F)
Score Interpretations:
0 - 5. Terrible. Strongly consider trying other options available to you. You can still achieve your goals in this range, and if you worked with someone who was a better fit it would almost certainly happen much faster and be more enjoyable.
6 - 10. Still bad. Strongly consider trying other options available to you.
11 - 13. Good. This is where things start to get into a range where things are likely to be successful. If you rated your therapy experience to be within this range and you only had an intake or recently started, consider scheduling a couple more intake appointments if it’s within your budget to do so. Hitting the great range is absolutely worth it.
14 - 15. Great. I would bet on things going really well.
Written by Dr. Luke Bieber on June 20, 2025